Using neuroscience to my child’s success - Praise, performance and stress

As parents, we understand how important praise is in shaping our children into their best selves. But have we considered if we are approaching this in the right way?

A growth mindset is something every parent should incorporate into their children’s way of thinking. It is defined as “the idea that we can get better at things – our abilities are malleable and our brains can learn and change (neuroplasticity) to achieve more”. A fixed mindset, however, is the opposite, and describes a mindset that believes it can not change and is born with certain unmalleable skills. 

Mindsets such as these define the dynamics of our relationship with our children. How can we harness this? 

Praise

Surprisingly, the praise we give to our children can undermine their performance. “Intelligence feedback” can stunt their performance, as it leads to children seeking easier challenges to ensure their success, which leads to praise. Intelligence feedback (tied to labels of identity) involves telling a child they’re good at learning, picking up something easily e.g. You’re a natural! You're so smart, She’s so talented. Effort feedback (tied to verbs) however, praises persistence, effort and hardwork.

One of the earliest study (https://cpb-us-w2.wpmucdn.com/web.sas.upenn.edu/dist/b/398/files/2019/04/1998-04530-003-1sagefw.pdf)

into growth mindsets revealed such evidence. A summary is presented below. 

      Study: giving intelligence praise reduced performance in children versus effort feedback which improved praise.

  • Children who receive intelligence praise take on fewer problems overall and limit the challenges they engage in
  • Children who receive intelligence praise tend to misrepresent themselves and even lie to make themselves look better than they actually performed (even if they performed well but not perfectly)

Stress

It may be surprising to hear that negative beliefs can cause negative consequences the same way positive beliefs can produce positive results. An important idea to grasp is that stress is not inherently bad - it can enhance performance and allow children to access a growth mindset. 

    Study supported evidence for leveraging stress as enhancing mindset

  • Condition 1: people are exposed to true information about how stress can diminish performance and then given a task
  • Condition 2: people are exposed to true information about how stress can enhance performance when given a task

             Result: people in condition 2 performed better – it’s all about mindset; stress shifts the ability to allocate resources and improve response. These results have been replicated across many groups in various settings.

What this means is that whenever your child is stressed, acknowledge that stress can have negative effects such as sweating and anxiety (check out our blog on school anxiety (https://www.concepteducation.com.au/blog-posts/school-anxiety-is-a-problem-how-can-you-help-your-child) for help). However, also start the discussion on how stress can prepare us for an important event and prime us to do our best. Tell your child a time of when you were stressed but harnessed it to excel. Role modelling healthy stress management will help keep your child’s relationship with stress healthy! 

Sources: https://hubermanlab.com/

Dr. Andrew Huberman, Ph.D. is a Professor of Neurobiology and Ophthalmology at Stanford University School of Medicine. His lab focuses on neural regeneration, neuroplasticity, and brain states such as stress, focus, fear, and optimal performance.

Want to discuss the next step to giving your child the growth mindset they deserve? Reach out to Concept - we're always happy to help!

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